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Writer's pictureShe Selfish

Unsettling to Settle


I’m no relationship expert but I have to admit that it takes courage to confront your feelings and acknowledge that something in your relationship doesn’t feel quite right or that something is missing.  The fear isn’t in the waiting it’s in settling. I see fear in your eyes and hear anxiousness in your hearts derived from the idea of being single. Fearing the possibility of not being in a relationship or getting married should not dictate how your relationships function. Fear should never be where decisions of action are based. It’s not easy for anyone to have to grapple with the idea that you might be settling  for less than you deserve, but it’s an important step in your journey toward finding fulfillment and happiness. You deserve to be in a relationship where you feel respected, cherished, supported where you’re heard and your feelings are acknowledged. You are worthy of love and happiness,  “ NEVER” settle for a partner who doesn’t recognize and practice these things or one who doesn’t  celebrate your worth. Have the strength to always fight for what you deserve. Have the strength to speak up, and stop letting people treat you with love that is half complete.

Remember that you have the power to make choices that align with your values, boundaries and priorities. If after careful prayer and communication, you still feel like you’re settling in your relationship, it’s okay to reassess your options and consider what’s best for your happiness and well-being. Trust yourself and your instincts, and know that you have the strength and resilience to navigate whatever path lies ahead.


Above all, be gentle with yourself during this process.


It’s okay to feel uncertain or scared about the future. Give yourself permission to explore your feelings and make decisions that honor your needs and desires, no matter how uncomfortable they are. Remember you deserve to be in a healthy relationship that brings you joy and fulfillment.


-Tannis Richardson

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